Shah Rukh Khan's sci-fi film RA.One walked away with two trophies for Worst Film and Worst Director for Anubhav Sinha.

The award for the Most Atrocious Lyrics went to Amitabh Bhattacharyya for Pyar do pyar lo ( Thank You ), Jigar ka tukda ( Ladies vs Ricky Bahl ), and Mutton song ( Luv Ka The End ). Teri meri from Bodyguard was named Most Irritating Song.

Prateik was given the for Worst Supporting Actor award for Dum Maaro Dum and Aarakshan . A special Platinum Kela award was however given to filmmaker Kanti Shah for excellence in cinema.

"I'm feeling good at being invited at the event. It's special because its been organised by true fans of my style of movie-making.

I have been to other award shows as well, but this definitely is special being solely driven by fans of my movies," said Shah, on receiving the award. Actor Pankaj Kapoor's maiden directorial venture Mausam got the Bawra Ho Gaya Ke Award, while Chirag Paswan won the Worst Debutante for Miley Na Miley Hum , and Esha Deol won the award for the Worst Attempt at a Comeback for Tell Me O Kkhuda .

The Lajja Award for worst treatment of a serious issue went to Aarakshan and Pritam was awarded the Bas Kijiye Bohut Ho Gaya Award. However, there was a special category of 'Anti-Kela' awards for the films that were the saving graces of 2011.

The recipients were Yeh Saali Zindagi , Saheb, Biwi Aur Gangster , Shaitan and Shor in the City "I think Sudhir should be the one accepting this. I'm quite honored and amused to accept this award.

It is good to see this movie getting some recognition. And you guys obviously have a great choice," said an ecstatic Arunoday Singh, on receiving the award for Yeh Saali Zindagi .

Tweet (less)

. The whole year round, we hear of movies and stars going to, being selected for, and winning awards at various global festivals - but I'm not sure most of us, the writers included, quite understand the comparative relevance or magnitude.

At some subconscious level, we club all "international" recognition at the same plane, including most of the media..

. Forget the media, our industry doesn't have a clue! That whole market works in a certain way; they don't have a clue how it works.

Right. So you're being talked about in the Cannes context.

What's the big deal? What exactly is Cannes about? It's very simple. There are four official sections, which are the competitive ones and the ones where movies are selected on merit (it's rather complex for a layperson to understand).

And there's a common award across all the four categories, which is the Camera d'Or. First-time filmmaker, kisi bhi category mein, Camera d'Or ke liye eligible hota hai, which is the first-time filmmaker award - jo Salaam Bombay ko mila tha, which changed Meera's life.

So these are the four categories. And then there's the Market - the Marche du Film.

For the Market, anyone can go. A random Kanti Shah can also go to a Market.

All he has to do is pay money for it, and book a screening, to sell the film. So India se jo filmein jati hain, hamesha Market mein jaati hain (laughs), which is simply a paid screening.

And we keep saying 'It's been selected for..

.' Yes.

..

'It's been selected for'. And the Red Carpet people go to, which we make so much fuss about, is sponsored by some brands which support the festival; like Chivas supports it, L'Oreal supports it.

..

So that appearance is that kind of a thing. What you're saying is they're not going as 'film people' in their own right? They're not; they're going as brand ambassadors.

There's a slot for L'Oreal, or Chivas, whosoever they bring, will walk. And they use it for their advertising.

Cannes never uses those pictures. You'll never find it on the Cannes sites.

So yahaan pe kya hota hai, anybody who's going to Cannes, we say, they are walking the Red Carpet. Red Carpet toh, hamare IFFI (International Film Festival of India) mein bhi hota hai (laughs).

Carpet ka colour red hota hai! It's all a media thing. Officially, India se, pichle nau saal mein - iss saal chaar jaa rahi hain - aur ek Udaan gayi thi.

Aur kabhi koi film hi nahi select hui hai! Officially. Films have been selected by filmmakers of Indian origin or something to do with India, like Chatrak gayi thi, by a Sri Lankan filmmaker, but shot in India.

Partly funded by an Indian. So those kinds of things have happened.

But a very Indian film has hardly ever gone there. So there's no correlation between big money, superstars, and recognition at such events, right? Hum log bohot kam paison mein banate hain.

Gangs of Wasseypur studio-funded hai. If I'm directing, I get funded by the studio.

If I am producing, newcomers, they don't get funded by the studio. Because of our various festival things, today I don't need a studio to fund an independent movie.

I get money from Germany, from France. Like Peddlers, they made it with money on Facebook.

We just put it out that we need partners, giving 10 lakh each. In two days, we had the money that we needed.

So, the movie has become a fund. So that when it goes to Cannes and gets sold, they get returns.

And they get a co-producer credit. It's like how Reliance started.

That's the only way. Go to like-minded people who want this kind of cinema, to give you money, so that you can keep making this kind of cinema.

I don't need a studio, I don't need a star. We're making a film called Lunchbox; Germany gave us 100,000 Euros.

I have learnt this the hard way and we have consistently been delivering. Because we are representing India on the international platform, with a regularity over the last four years - we have been at every festival.

If you look at Cannes, out of the four films selected, three are ours. Udaan was also ours.

So the maximum representation is going from us. They trust us.

Now we are doing co-production - the man who made No Man's Land, we are co-producing his next film. The Brazilian government is announcing a co-production, which I am co-producing, for a Brazilian filmmaker in Columbia, which is co-produced by Oscar-winning Walter Salus.

And I co-produced Michael Winterbottom's Trishna . Now any international film coming to India, they want to work with us.

What happens is, most of the festivals, distributors don't want to deal with Indians. Because the first question Indians ask is kitna doge? That's the only question they know how to ask.

Inka diaspora ka market hai na. So then this is the biggest year, in that sense, if you're saying four.

..

Yes. This is the biggest year so far for India in the history of Cannes, because itni filmein ek saath kabhi nahin gayin.

Jab Ray ki film jaati thi, toh ek Ray ki jaati thi, ya ek Mrinalda ki gayi thi. This time, we have Gangs Of Wasseypur, parts one and two, if you count them as two, otherwise it's one.

So there's Gangs of Wasseypur, Peddlers, Miss Lovely, and Kalpana restored, Cannes Classic mein. Kalpana jo Martin Scorsese ne restore ki hai, the Indian film of Uday Shankar, 1948 mein jo bani thi.

Yeh print kho gaya tha jo bahar ke aadmi ne sponsor kiya hai (laughs), and actually if you see, there's a guy that nobody in media is talking about, is Shivendra Singh Dungarpur, Raj Singh Dungarpur's son, ad filmmaker, who's become part of the restoration process, who found Kalpana. He's the one who is funding the restoration of the next Hitchcock film, from his own hard-earned advertising money.

He's become part of the organisation. Whose achievement the media has completely skipped.

Nobody knows. Shivendra Singh Dungarpur has gone ahead and done something nobody's doing.

He's restoring old Indian classics. He's got Satyajit Ray's Ghatak, they're all being restored because of this one man's effort.

He's doing something incredibly great. Media doesn't know what restoration is, media doesn't know how it matters, media doesn't know what it takes, how it is done in this one place in Italy.

Media doesn't know these things. They'll ask him, 'achha aap restoration kar rahe hain.

..

aap Scorsese se mile?' (laughs). There is a power hierarchy in the industry? Absolutely.

It's always been there, in any industry. It's everywhere.

Yes, but this is seen as a very loosely structured, organic, symbiotic activity..

. Yeah, it is, but the hierarchy, it is in the very nature of our country.

It's like growing up, you know, you talk like that. If your boss' son comes around, he's treated differently.

When a girl is looking for a groom, what matters is whose son it is, what's his surname, which family he belongs to, rather than what does the groom do? It holds true in every walk of our life. Because if we were not like that, we wouldn't have, you know.

..

If you see, every politician's son often ends up taking the same portfolio his father did, in this country. And he becomes eligible simply by being his son.

So that's the country we live in. So why crib if it happens in cinema? Yeah.

Cinema mein it's just more obvious and every day in the papers. But it's in every walk of life.

You go anywhere. So with somebody like you, whose dad is not there to give you a foothold in the industry, how much longer does it take to make your own niche? In today's time, it might not take long if you have talent.

When I came into the industry, your survival depended entirely on what you were doing and what you were achieving. Today, the monies are different, there's a huge amount of money in television, people get employed very easily.

And the hunger dies out easily. We were starving for a long time, hence that passion and the drive was much more.

Today, the drive is immediately controlled with substance. The money flows in very quickly.

..

? Money flows in very quickly, the material satisfaction comes in very fast. So that, hunger is not sustained long enough, that material cannot satisfy it.

You mean they get they get the first BMW and they've arrived..

. They get the first car, the first house, very soon, and then they live for the EMIs.

The EMIs take over their lives. Somehow that sustenance or hunger is not there anymore.

And the passion today, be it cinema, be it anything, is about what one can do with a form, but the fact is, 90% of them actually don't have anything to say. They have already decided the form and they're trying to fit into the context.

Especially television? Especially television. They are thinking from, 'this is an established format, and what do I do within those five different genres, to fit into it.

' You're like, ok, 'I also have a story like this back home, I'll put that story.' But it's essentially the same story.

So people have less to say today. But there is money also available for new ideas.

..

Today the money is available, and today technology has made making a film cheaper. Today, people are making films in 10 lakh, 2 lakh, 5 lakh.

The whole indie movement, which is actually not at the surface right now. People don't know about it right now because none of it has so far broken through.

But there's tons of films being made, at such low costs. One film that broke through in the very small indie festivals was Kshay, which is trying to release on the 15th of June.

But made for 15 lakh, 10 lakh, 20 lakh, very powerful films. People are shooting on small go-pro cameras and everything, with actors who are working for free, with 3g and 4g the short film format, there's a huge movement there.

People are making these incredible short films, which they are watching among themselves, and this whole lot of new generation, college students, who are always on YouTube , are passing those films around. I'm just waiting for it to explode.

It will explode. The moment it becomes, uhh, broadband, free flow broadband to everywhere, it will break through.

Where's the money in it? There is right now no money it. Tomorrow, with broadband, the guy who'll create content will be king.

Abhi unhone piracy band karva diya, now they will slowly start making revenue out of it. Because of piracy they could not add revenue to it.

People will start paying, and they are minuscule amounts. For small amounts, 30 bucks, short films you can watch for 10 rupees, so with that, in volume, there'll be more people downloading it and keeping it in their digital libraries.

It's affordable prices. The price of a small Coke bottle.

Today most of these alcohol brands, and all the brands that are not allowed to advertise, they used music earlier, to advertise themselves - surrogate advertising. Now they're using these short films.

If you see, all of them. You go on the site of any of these alcohol brands, they have these short films, using the brand, and they spread it out.

So there's a different kind of a democracy that will start operating there. But most of the Bollywood industry is not thinking about that.

There's a new audience being formed, which will not want to go to a theatre, and (will) watch the film on their laptop. And world over they have already started catering to that audience.

In India, they have just begun, and people who have begun are these tech savvy guys who've got nothing to do with creativity. Which is why it's not working, because there's a big gap there, a big chasm.

They have created formats, they've created platforms, but they don't know how to access these creative people. You were recently asked that you make very dark cinema, and you replied that when you go international, people tell you that you make very light cinema, and you should go darker! That's a very relative thing na, it's extremely relative.

Because people often ask me, why do you do this kind of work? My thing is aap bahar jao, toh aam baat hai, log realistic cinema banate hain. Ham log itna zyada fantasy world create karte hain, ki uske comparison mein I start to seem like too dark and too real.

But if you actually compare it to too dark and too real, then you'll suddenly find a kind of softness in my films! I even use music..

. There's a frequent argument one hears, which essentially is that without the five song sequences and the whole melodrama, it's not really Indian.

..

this is 'Indian cinema', so why should we ape the West? So the moment you're making a 'realistic movie'..

. .

..

yeah, it becomes aping the West . Matlab, someone tell me, the realistic movie is set in India, it is shot India, it's about India.

How can it be aping the West? Does that argument, that we should actually celebrate our song and dance model of cinema, hold? We should! I'm saying we should. But we should not negate what the other things are.

Today, what Marathi and Tamil cinema have achieved, it is much more than what Bollywood can achieve. There are more Marathi films in a year, that you can talk about, which are represented internationally, than Hindi.

There's a whole new wave in Marathi led by these two boys - Girish Kulkarni, the actor/writer, and Umesh Kulkarni. Mainstream doesn't hear about it.

Marathi people are very proud about it. There's a whole lot of new wave in Tamil.

These Madurai filmmakers..

. my first card in Wasseypur.

..

my film is dedicated to the Madurai triumvirate. People have changed Tamil cinema, worked against the system.

Bala, Amir Sultan, Rasi Kumar, Vetrimaran - who's won the National Award, they've made the most extraordinary films in the last two years, and at the national level people don't even know about it. Kumar Raja, who won the National Award for best debut filmmaker - his film never went outside Tamil Nadu.

These are the people who are changing things, and they're also very cut off. So when international scouts come looking for films from India, they never reach Chennai.

And those guys also don't understand international festivals. How will that change? See, things are changing.

Till now, distributors have had this very interesting formula of discovering which film will work, based on who's in it. That's very easy - film mein Akshay Kumar hai, film ki utni opening lagegi.

So there's a whole lot of journalists and trade people whose survival depends on this system. Now, a Vicky Donor, Paan Singh Tomar works, they suddenly don't know how to do, what to do, because they can't judge a script.

They can't judge a film without knowing who's in it. So they feel threatened, so they have to keep that philosophy sustained.

So they keep sustaining that, and they are supposed to be the experts..

. Ok, so non-star movies working - that will change the equilibrium? Yes.

It'll change the equilibrium. New media houses coming in, new TV channels coming in, they want a voice from the film industry who's an 'expert', so they often get these same people.

So these same people are brought in, and they keep sustaining the philosophy. Koi progress hoga hi nahin.

'Great opening'. Today a common man on the streets talks about 'iss film ki itni opening lagi thi'.

Nobody talks about content any more. A man on the streets knows iss film ne sau karod kamaye, toh film automatically great ho gayi.

So common aadmi jab yeh baat karne lag jata hai, it becomes even more difficult for the other kind of cinema to survive. Whereas in Tamil Nadu, most of the films that have changed things have not had stars, and have been declared hits in the sixth or seventh week.

Marathi cinema does not have a star system. It's only content that sells.

The director has become the star - people start trusting a director, ki iski film aayegi. That is quintessential Hollywood , in a sense.

..

Yeah, quintessential European, Hollywood, everywhere. The director is the man who makes the film.

Usmein the only way you can survive is consistency, and frequency. For me, the only method to survive was ki consistently ek ke baad ek film banate jaao, saal mein ek-do release honi zaroori hai.

If I'm not directing, I should at least be producing a film, so then, I'll be on (less)

Debutante director Sneha Tulli is all geared up to make a biopic on Kanti Shah, the famous B-Grade filmmaker of Bollywood. For the uninitiated, Kanti Shah is the one who made the small single screen theatres buzz with activity.

With films like Lage Raho Partner, Free Entry, Shaadi Basanti Ki Honeymoon Gabbar Ka and the cult 'so-bad-it's-good' Mithun starrer Gunda in his kitty, Kanti Shah was the undisputed king of adult cinema. Line producer Rakesh Sabharwal of Prince Movies confirmed the news and said, "We do have a character inspired by Kanti Shah in the film.

I wouldn't call it a biography, but the film is definitely about him." The film has been titled Ye Hai Mumbai .

Explaining the character in the film and its similarities with Kanti Shah's life, Sabharwal added, "The character in our film is called Shanti Shah. Bijendra Kale will play the role.

It is more or less like a spoof on the filmmaker. However, there are a few instances from Kanti Shah's life that have been incorporated in the film.

For example, we have the entire episode involving the Deols, wherein Sunny and Bobby bashed him up, as a part of the film. His famous 'rivalry' with Yash Chopra is also a part of the film.

" For those unaware of the Deol episode, Kanti Shah had once bluffed Dharmendra into acting out a scene, which turned out to be quite risque. Sunny Deol, on learning this, confiscated all the prints of the film and gave Kanti Shah more than an earful.

"Kanti Shah was the one who started the trend of small films. He made the entire B-grade cinema industry boom.

At one point, even big producers used to be apprehensive about releasing their films alongside his. Kanti Shah would make four films in a year.

..

He would simply add a couple of words to any major film that was announced and within a fortnight release his film alongside it. His career is inspiring.

That's why we are making a film on him," explained Sabharwal (less)

The announcement on Shah's film was used as an advertisement in a trade magazine recently. Kumar Mohan, the editor of the magazine, recalls, "When Kanti Shah came to me with the advertisement I laughed and told him that I knew he was capable of making the most of such ideas.

These films are made on a shoestring budget of around Rs 25 lakh." Shah admits, "The day the song became a hit I decided to make the film.

I finished shooting within 12 days." Shah insists his film is original and says, "I have only borrowed the first line of the song.

" But interestingly, Shah's wife Sapna, the protagonist in his film, plays a small-time heroine, much like Katrina, in the film. Despite the grey areas, Shah wants to time the release of his film with Tees Maar Khan .

He says, "I am working towards releasing the film on December 24. If I miss that I will surely release it in January 2011.

" Are you fine with that Farah? (less)

I didn't have time. Nothing grabbed my attention then.

Talk shows are too personal because so much about your own life emerges through them. I am an adventurous person and when I heard about this show, I had to give it a shot.

All your friends from the industry (Shah Rukh, Salman, Abhishek, Amitabh) have hosted TV shows. Did you ask them for tips? They told me to relax and be myself.

Whoever met me said do what you want. When will you return to the big screen? You will see me in movies this year.

Why have you turned down scripts in the past few years? I was busy over the past six months with the court cases and the fights with BCCI. Before the IPL, I can shoot for the show.

IPL follows, and then I will take a month off before shooting for my film. You made a successful transition from acting to entrepreneurship.

Earlier, I never had the courage to try something completely different. Once I was at the top of my game and opportunity came, I said, 'I want to try this.

' I could have done it a bit differently by doing one film a year at least. But I got so consumed by various things that I did not have time for anything else.

Are you in touch with people from the industry? Of course. I always meet filmmakers who call me for script narrations and politely say, 'Not right now, later'.

I listen to every script and that's why they have always been nice to me. You can never forget where you have come from and the people who have helped you get there.

Have you refused any exciting projects? I have said no to most of the major releases that have done extremely well. It is not in my personality to say I was offered this and that.

Any regrets? None. In the past 10 years, I have done big films, given big hits.

I was never a B grade or C grade actress. I started with Dil Se.

I am the only actress in my generation to have worked with Yash Chopra. I have been very lucky.

I have never seen crazy failures in films. I did see a difficult side of life personally and it has made me tougher, stronger and smarter.

I hope. When your IPL team Kings XI Punjab came under the scanner, how did you deal with the allegations? There were allegations against all the teams.

We emerged clean, and had the court to back us. After all these investigations and after people pointing fingers at us, we went to court and won fair and square.

I would have died of a heart attack if I had been accused of something that I have never done in my life. Did you discuss issues with your business partner Ness Wadia? I was in discussion with all my partners and there is no one in particular that I turned to.

What's your involvement with the Kamal Amrohi property case? I am not anybody's legal heir, nor am I inheriting anything from anybody. I have a lot of respect for him and he is a gentleman.

He was in a lot of trouble and I helped him. He asked me to help him.

But people blew up the story. The only inheritance I will ever get is from my father.

But he publicly said he wants to give you his property. Well, yeah! But I haven't taken anything from him.

Are you in touch with Ness? Why is he so important to everybody? It was over between us two years ago and you should let it be. Is there a new man in your life? No, not right now.

Have you turned celibate? (Laughs) No, I am normal. If I meet someone, I am happy to have a chat.

But I am not seeing anyone in particular right now. Would you want to marry soon? Of course! I am like anybody else (less)

This C-grade film plays a pivotal role in Anurag���s film Udaan; it changes the lead character Rohan���s (Rajat Barmecha) life forever. When Anurag announced this screening on a social networking site, surprisingly, over 200 teenagers expressed interest in it.

Our source said, ���Rajat���s character in the film, Rohan gets caught by his teacher and gets expelled from school, when he is watching Angoor. He faces a lot of turmoil after this.

Since it is an important scene in the film, producer Anurag Kashyap decided to highlight it by arranging for a special screening of Angoor for teenagers, with Rajat Barmecha and the director of Udaan, Vikramaditya Motwane present. Since Angoor is not available on the Internet, a special screening was organised and since most of the kids were under the age of 18, the screening was more of an underground one at Anurag���s office.

Around 50 teenagers turned up to watch it.��� When contacted, Shikha Kapoor, Senior VP, Marketing, UTV Motion Pictures said, ���I think this is the base where the movie starts and we thought it was a nice marketing idea.

Surprisingly there were many takers for the film (Angoor). It was just a screening with some fun.

��� (less)

The announcement on Shah’s film was used as an advertisement in a trade magazine recently. Kumar Mohan, the editor of the magazine, recalls, “When Kanti Shah came to me with the advertisement I laughed and told him that I knew he was capable of making the most of such ideas.

These films are made on a shoestring budget of around Rs 25 lakh.” A poster of Sheila Ki Jawani Shah admits, “The day the song became a hit I decided to make the film.

I finished shooting within 12 days.”Shah insists his film is original and says, “I have only borrowed the first line of the song.

” But interestingly, Shah’s wife Sapna, the protagonist in his film, plays a small-time heroine, much like Katrina, in the film.Despite the grey areas, Shah wants to time the release of his film with Tees Maar Khan.

He says, “I am working towards releasing the film on December 24. If I miss that I will surely release it in January 2011.

” Are you fine with that Farah? —Bharti Dubey (less)

So gritty and real, you can actually smell the sweaty men of Mumbai���s mafia. It���s a bummer that despite Bollywood���s fixation with gangsters, nothing���s come even close to this work of art ��� Vishal Bhardwaj���s Maqbool was probably a distant second.

Farhan Akhtar���s Dil Chahta Hai : This film gifted to India the metrosexual man: single, city-bred, emotionally soft but not sissy, clean-shaven, dressed fit, hair spiked. Movies in Bollywood may or may not have changed since.

The urban Indian man certainly began to look different after. Rajkumar Santoshi���s Andaaz Apna Apna : There are only two questions that baffle you about this film: How could this craziest, male-bonding, super low-brow, comic masterpiece, with the nation���s top superstars, bomb at the cinemas on its release? And how, exactly, does Crime Master Gogo plan to play goti (marbles) with your eyeballs? The second question���s the easier one to figure.

Kundan Shah���s Jaane Bhi Do Yaaro: Hot editor simultaneously plays two photo-journos. Eager boys go where few men have been before ��� not to the ed���s bed, but through the city���s posh underbelly: among sold-out bureaucrats, the builder lobby et al.

It���s mildly suggestive that the most serious film on the monumentally corrupt India of the ���80s should turn out to be among the finest comedies of cinema ever. Kanti Shah���s GundA : Set somewhere between a dockyard and the countryside, where rape���s the national sport; all characters rhyme their speech; each is a moron, unique to world cinema: Chuttiya on ���Vitamin Sex���, Bulla, Natte, Pote, Chikna��� Super-star Shankar sets them right.

Boys across engineering schools are known to watch this Mithun masterpiece many times over, on shared networks. They apparently sense science in its screenplay, something lay viewers are unable to fully appreciate.

World cinema Sidney Lumet���s Serpico and Dog Day Afternoon: One���s a crackling , conflicted police drama that reminds you wholly of Govind Nihalani���s Ardh Satya. The other���s a stunning hostage piece that turns into a media circus.

Both star an early Al Pacino, the ultimate male icon. Oliver Stone���s Born On The Fourth Of July and Wall Street : Wars, in movies or otherwise, are about old men talking, and young men dying.

Born��� taught us another important American lesson: Tom Cruise can act. Wall Street of course let us in on an altogether separate chapter on reading films: We selectively take from movies whatever the hell we want.

Gordon Gekko (Michael Douglas) was Wall Street���s grossest villain. He turned out to be the male, go-getter���s unparalleled role model: Greed is good ���n��� all.

Say that again if you���re still an investment banker. Ridley Scott���s Blade Runner : Male geek gods never quite grow up.

This is not a surprise, given sci-fi wizardry ( Star Wars ) and netherworld fantasies ( Lord Of The Rings ) are their only reality checks. I���m not the world���s hugest obsesso of the genre, so I know Blade Runner���s the best ever: it can spin my head over, surely it can do a lot more things to others.

Sergio Leone���s The Good, The Bad, The Ugly : All guns, gruffly machismo, silly lines made to sound all-important, and not even a half-written girl character in sight. This is, at its best, the primary, plotless Western: a genre that in itself, across the world, is tailor-made for men alone.

How many women have you met who obsessively swear by Sholay ? None that I know of. Bernardo Betrolucci���s Last Tango In Paris : ���What is this,��� she asks, pointing to his naked body part.

���It���s a man���s penis,��� he says, ���And a woman���s happiness.��� He���s a middle-aged, meditative Marlon Brando; she, the gorgeous Maria Schneider.

The two anonymously make unconditional love in Paris, with pleasure, without guilt: delicious, equally disturbing, and anything but juvenile porn. (less)

"I think this was going to happen one day anyway..

.it's pre-ordained.

We are all very excited, the kids especially," she said. Madhuri quit Bollywood when she was at the top of her game, a shockingly unconventional move in an industry where stars hang around much after their time is up.

One of her biggest hits, Dil To Pagal Hai released in 1997. The same year, her performance in Mrityudand won her critical acclaim.

Yet, just a year-and-a-half later, she gave it all up for a quiet married life as Madhuri-Dixit Nene. Madhuri said she has begun looking for a school for Arin, a grade III student and Ryan, who is in grade 1.

Dr Nene is also in touch with his friends in the medical field and some top-notch hospitals in the city. "Everything is changing rapidly in India.

It's a land of opportunities. There is so much to do there.

So we thought this is the right time." It is, for her too.

Bollywood has changed for better in the years Madhuri was away. For one, the industry is far more professional than it was in the 80s and 90s.

Banks, and not gangland's slush funds, finance movies now. Though a handful of stars still are the focus, bound scripts are garnering greater respect.

But then, she never quite left. Madhuri was maverick painter late M F Husain's muse in Gaja Gamini (2000) and Shah Rukh Khan's Chandramukhi in Sanjay Leela Bhansali's Devdas (2002).

In between, she did Pukar with Anil Kapoor, one of her favourite co-stars. Her last film, Aaja Nach Le , an ode to Madhuri's dancing prowess, didn't do too well at the box office.

Asked what drove the decision to return to Mumbai, Madhuri said there were many factors involved, including the fact that she and her husband would like Arin and Ryan to grow up in India. "It would be a great experience culturally for them.

This is where their roots are. They are at an age where they can adapt quickly.

They'll be giving up their friends here, but they are looking forward to making friends there. I want them to learn Hindi and Marathi.

I think it will be an exciting time for them too." The actress said she is now working on plans to turn her Juhu pad kids-friendly before the family moves in.

"I don't intend to buy a new house, but the Juhu apartment will undergo some changes." Madhuri, who won five Filmfare awards and was honoured with a Padmashri in 2008, is returning home in exciting times -- Bollywood has delivered some monstrous hits recently; television is now as big as filmdom, if not bigger; item songs, something that should come naturally to her, are as coveted as big films; and small-budget flicks are finding audiences in big numbers.

There is a new sense of buoyancy -- almost like the industry is humming one of her popular numbers -- humko aaj kal hein intezaar (less)

I was five years old in 1970 when my dad (actor-producer Kamran Khan) had a spate of hits. The films were not A-grade movies but he was doing very well in his own right.

I remember we had the first Impala car. Sajid had just been born and I was this absolutely spoilt child.

Then in 1971 he made a film called Aisa Bhi Hota Hai into which he put all his personal money and the film bombed on the opening Friday. I remember it because I had gone to the theatre on Friday very excitedly with my grandmother and the theatre was empty.

By Monday people stopped coming to our house. It was like a funeral.

Our house usually used to be full of people. But by Monday, it was empty.

And then there were bad times for 15 years till 1985, when he died. It was a very hard time, especially for him.

There are too many! I remember that everyday I had to go and buy a new record, by which I mean EPs or LPs. I was a spoilt child, so everyday, I was taken in the Impala car to Linking road, where there was this shop Twist and I would buy one.

There used to be big parties in our house. Sanjeev Kumar, Jeetendra, Kalyanji bhai, Anandji bhai and people like that would attend.

The bad times lasted longer than the good times. And also I was much older then.

I know it sounds very filmi, but like you saw in the 1970s' films that things are being sold from the house it was literally like that. The one time I was really upset was when my gramophone had to be sold.

But that had to be done because there was no source of income. My father was a very proud man.

The Impala was sold and he obviously wouldn't travel by bus to go anywhere. So he would just be home, and then he started drinking.

I think those were really bad times. No, I don't think so.

I was not an angry, bitter person, but Sajid was. He had a very difficult time.

He is five years younger than me and unfortunately he had been put in a very posh school. I went to a normal convent school but he was in a very posh school and being the poor child there was not helping.

He used to be this very angry child and at one time we really thought that he was going to be a juvenile delinquent. So I am really very proud of what he does right now and he has really made something of his life.

He used to go around scratching people's cars saying 'I don't have a car so I will destroy this car'. He was really like this devil child.

I didn't grow up to be bitter. It was just something I had to cope with and look after Sajid too after my mom started working.

Suddenly I was the responsible person of the house. By that time my mom had left my father.

I am still very insecure if I have not made a particular amount of money in a month. After a point, our house was run day-to-day.

The people in our building would use our flat to play cards in. They would remove a kitty, and it would be some 30 bucks for the entire day.

And that would be used to buy the milk and the grocery. And if for some reason they didn't play that day, then those 30 bucks were not there.

I remember we used to run the house on 30 bucks a day. If all this had not happened to me I would not be who I am today.

Maybe I would not have that determination to do something and be something in life. I remember in college I didn't know what I wanted to do but I wanted to be somebody.

There had to be something different about me. So I would probably go out of my way to make friends and please people.

Maybe I took to dance because it made me feel special. I would go to a party or a social event and do my Michael Jackson moves and everybody would look at me.

And I used to like that attention. When I was approached to do the show I knew it had to be a slice of life show.

And it could not have been just another show where the stars come and plug their films or say all sorts of things that they themselves don't believe in. It had to be something about their lives and which is very personal to them, something that nobody knows about them.

Like do you know that the sexy glamourous Bipasha is the ghar ka beta. Some of her childhood experiences are quite amazing and she had tears in her eyes when she was speaking about it.

(Laughs) There are a lot of things that nobody knows and shouldn't even know! I am a very domesticated housewife at heart. I listen to what my husband tells me.

Not all the time, but I do respect what he says. Everyone thinks that I am this dominating creature and my poor husband must be henpecked but it's completely the opposite.

Whatever he says happens in the house, and how! I go outside and I shout and scream at people, but not in the house. In the house I'm a bheegi billi.

Just the fact that he said our children should never be publicised; I respect that and I haven't, despite having gotten so many opportunities to be on covers of magazines and papers. But because he is not comfortable with it, it will not happen.

Till he says it's okay to do it. He is one of the most important people in my life, regardless of man or woman.

I think when you have babies; no one else stands a chance, not even the husband. The most important people in my life right now are Diva, Anya and Czar, then of course Shirish, Shah Rukh, Sajid.

I have become far more aesthetic. Even in editing.

He is far more a visual director than I can ever hope to be. I am little boring on that front, I am a little straightforward.

Jaaneman was far ahead of its time. I think if it would release today, the audience would be ready for it.

Like a Kaminey today that you either love or hate. There is a certain audience today that has seen world cinema and is ready for this new age cinema.

I think the story was a bit old fashioned but it was presented in a snazzy way. He learnt a lot from it.

His new scripts are just fabulous. The way he thinks of constructing a scene is something I can't think of.

He just thinks out of the box. Quite a lot.

We are each others bouncing boards. Though some times my movies go over his head and he says, 'I can't understand what you are doing.

' He tells me, 'When I read it I am like what the hell but you do it with confidence.' He gives me all his scripts to read.

Our movies will never be alike which I think is very healthy if we are going to be in the same profession. Lots.

I didn't know that Hrithik still does one hour of speech exercises every day. He is afraid that the stammer will come back if he doesn't do it.

Or the things he went through as a child. As a 10-year-old boy he would sit in his room for 36 hours and practice one line to tell his cook, that I want to eat this, without stammering.

You get goose bumps when you hear all this. Check out Farah Khan's Pics '+ capt +' '; else var b2 = ' ' + tmpdiV + ' '+ capt +' (less)